“Look, there is a situation here,” the three-eye alien said
to the strawberry bear and Rex the dinosaur, “Your two planets have the highest mortality across the solar
system.”
“Very true,” the pink toy did not even sound apologetic,
“You know, we are badly short of manpower.”
“It is hardly the excuse – the entire universe has the same
problem,” the green creature shook his head, “But we’ve got to do something,
or, as Humphrey Appleby said, to appear to be doing something. What do you think
if we allocate one extra trainee to your planet next year?”
“That’s terrific! I’m sure that would help our survival
statistics a lot!” The strawberry bear cheered.
“Em… may I ask how could that junior trainee help so much?
Are you going to ask him to do extra ward round or have some focus care on
those very sick?” The three-eye alien scratched his head.
“No, none what-so-ever. He will not see any patient at all,”
the furry toy put up a wicked smile, “I shall ask him to put all his effort on
entering the diagnostic code of all comorbid diseases for our patients to the
computer system – however mild or irrelevant these diseases are. Once we have
the full – and maybe slightly inflated – detail on the complexity of our cases,
our mortality would appear lower after you perform statistical adjustment.”
“Alas, that’s really an ingenious and cost-effective way of
utilizing your manpower!” The thee-eye alien nodded in agreement, and he turned to the great creature, "What about you, Rex?"
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